It was so ludicrous that the President asked the foxes to guard the hen house when he proposed that the Arab company 'Dubai Ports' take over national port security in this country - I had to see all this to its 'logical conclusion'! Ha! This is a letter I could see the Bush administration sending out to the rest of the members of the republican party.

Dear Fellow Republicans:

Now that we have solved the problem of our country's port security by using 'Dubai Ports World' from the United Arab Emirates, let us move on to solve other pressing problems.

We are talking with our partner Mexico to stop illegal immigration into the United States and they have suggested we use one of their fine reputable companies to guard our country's borders. Sounds like an excellent idea to me.

Colombia is our most important partner in the drug war, and they are stepping up to the plate too by recommending we use one of their fine organizations called "Drogas No!" to stop the flow of drugs into the United States. It will increase the 5 billion dollars we spend for Colombia's help now to 25 billion - but what the heck, we got deep pockets! And it will free up much money and personnel that we are currently wasting in that job - like the Coast Guard and the DEA.

Now if any of you have a problem with this - take it up with Dick Cheney. He is riding shotgun on these deals and you know how he reacts to doubtful party members.

Your friend in Jesus, Allah, Buddha, and Bubba.

W.